Adult Proof Packaging on Children's Toys

**I originally wrote this blog while a sports yes, sports blogger at cbssports on April 20, 2008, but I felt it was worthy of a re-post (as I am consolidating my random musings for your entertainment)**


This afternoon, I threw small fry his party for his 5th birthday. We had it at a local park, and the kids played, then used clay to make random things, and boy do I mean random. Grandpa grilled up some hotdogs. We had a pinata, which surprisingly with a bunch of 5'ish year olds whacking at it with a stick, it's still in tact. The kids rode the old train and carousel had a decent time. I gave them their goody bags and pumped them full of sugar from the cake.
My frustration stems from the great toys my son received as gifts. For those of you who have kids, you know where I am going...the same frustration arises Christmas morning, while your child is impatiently awaiting for you to open the package, that apparently is more secure than Fort Knox...and the frustration that you find while opening these packages is rather similar to that of going on a quest for the Holy Grail, and bumping into the French, who are taunting you -- all the while saying that they have a Grail...
Okay, so we get home this afternoon, I am putting things up, and he comes into the kitchen, Mommy, can you open this PULEEEZE??? to which I did two things, first I looked at how complex the packaging was, and then I said, sweetie, Mommy is busy, can you play with this....

A few moments later, I found myself in the foyer surrounded by cool, but inexpensive toys...and I begin digging into the packages. The tape they use on these things to secure the box, could seal the Space Shuttle for it's entire voyage....for a million years. Once you get the package open, you encounter these plastic coated wires, with a plastic anchor...you must twist these little wires - which by the way are usually under the toy or on the back...very hard to maneuver and undo them. Then some of these little toys have clear rubberbands twisted around said item...it takes me a good while to get through all his toys, and then I look up to my Mom, and say, some poor person in a third-world country probably got paid 25¢ in a month to twist these stupid things...not to mention all this crap is bad for the environment.
Here's a suggestion for your next round of toy opening with a child...scissors or pocket knife handy, as well as wire cutters, they work amazingly well.
Shoot, the wire cutters were just there in the cabinet...why did I make myself work so blasted hard...